The calm before the storm

So it's been a really weird day. Having completed packed yesterday, today was a "well, what do you wanna do" "I dunno, what do YOU wanna do" kinda day. Other than getting the house sparkling clean and running a couple last minute errands, we found ourselves without a purpose today. And since staying at home was not an option (long story) we just ventured out around town for a few hours and visited family and did a little 'window' shopping. It's just been strangely calm day considering we are about to go on a major trip.

But mostly today has been good for my nerves. For the better part of a week, I've been in a state of confusion as to whether to rent a car while we are in the Carolinas or let our friend tote us around. There were pros and cons to both scenarios, but I think I was waiting on Billy to just call and tell me what he wanted me to do and so I couldn't make the decision. I would get so wound up about it and for some reason I could NOT decide what to do and quite frankly was becoming a bit of a lunatic about it. Why won't Billy call and tell me what he wants me to do????  But then the moment came to me... I had a A-HA moment right there in the middle of Target... that I realized this wasn't Billy's decision to make. Billy needs me to be able to decide what is right for our family while he isn't able to. This is a major factor of being an Army wife. And even though this was a stupid decision about getting a rental car... there will be times when I will have to decide much bigger things. Like where we are going to live... how we are going to move there... and so forth. So this was a bit of an eye opener for me. "Becky, it is time to grow you some and stop doubting your decisions." The minute I made my decision (which was to not rent the car) I felt completely happy. All the cons to letting our friends drive us around turned out to be not so 'con' after all.

So tomorrow morning we are headed to Nashville to get on a jet plane!! WHOO HOO!! I'm gonna be sanging the whole way there... "I'm leeee-vin ooooon a jet plane! Don't know when I'l be back again!" YAY!!! And whatever happens after that is all a part of the floating and breathing bit of this whole journey. I honestly don't care if I sit in a small dungeon with a pile of hay to sleep on... as long as I get to spend a few hours with Billy.... as long as our kids get to crawl up in his lap and love on their daddy... as long as his mom and dad get to hug their son and tell him how proud they are of him. Everything else can just fall into place.