It Doesn't Have to Make Sense...

My husband joined the army almost two years ago. I forget the date exactly, but I remember it being super cold and snowy and January. Here we are two years later and I have to say, life has been..... well I don't even have a word for it. Does he love the Army? Well, it depends on what day you ask him. Things change constantly that there is no point in me going over all the details of all the things he was going to do and then didn't get to. Or the things he did that he didn't even know he was going to do. It's just been a ride. A big frantic ride.
But to catch you up a bit... about a month ago they started to asking for volunteers for a the "D" word. He asked me and I told I would support whatever decision he made. So, he volunteered. But then they denied him because... well we aren't really sure. But we think it's because he's been made the company's radiation officer and because he's the only one who really works like he's supposed to. He really wanted to go over there, and I know he was super disappointed. And to make matters worse, three of my girlfriend's husbands (whom we've all become very close with) are about to deploy in the next few months. Even Jonathan is getting to go - Billy's friend from his youth. I try and think about how it is just all part of God's plan and the timing just isn't right for him to go - if he ever gets to go at all. But that doesn't mean he doesn't feel low about it. Can you even believe I'm upset right along with him? I never wanted him to go in a million years. But I see how important it is for a soldier to do their part. To make the big contribution. Being home and playing in the gas chamber just doesn't feel like he's getting to be much of a soldier. Just feels like he's got a job and gets yelled at because he's still a private and privates get yelled at a lot. And don't even get me started on his promotion - or lack of. I could go into more detail and name names about people who he feels kinda screwed him out of getting a chance to do something worthwhile there in the Army, but it does no good to point fingers. Everything happens for a reason. One that we may not be able to see or understand, but one day it will all make sense.... because it sure doesn't make sense right now.