So Long, January!!!

This has been the LONGEST month in the history of the world. Or at least it feels that way. See, Billy gets paid in the middle of the month and the end of the month. And since this month had a holiday on the mid-month pay day... he got paid like 4 days early. Which usually isn't a big deal. But since the end of the month is like 20 days later.... that's incredibly hard. Now, I am a planner. And I knew this was coming. I looked ahead and realized that I would have to make every single dime and nickel and penny stretch as far as I could. But daggum! We are scraping the bottom of the pantry this week. As Billy put it, "we're putting Old Mother Hubbard to shame." And that's even after buying three weeks worth of groceries, staying home and not driving anywhere to save gas, and even with the extra cash coming in from babysitting my neighbors kids. So, I'll say this... yes, the military has LOTS of perks. But the pay is crap. It's ridiculous! For anyone to say we're in it for the money... they need to think again. However, the perks are great. So, I won't complain. It's just this month has been a bit tough.

Speaking of January... why is it 73 degrees outside??? My kids are outside in shorts and t-shirts. I've had my windows open the past couple days. It's just gorgeous outside! I look at the weather back home and see it's barely 50. So, this is crazy!!! Again... not complaining. I LOVE it!! I hate it for the folks back in TN and KY. I love it for me! But hate it for them. Yup... LOL!!

Anyway... I've decided that I need a new kitchen table and chairs. I need it more than I need a new couch. And that's saying something. See, the kids I've been watching this month... well, they decided to go all destructor on me last week. On top of the book ripped in half, a beheaded Buzz Lightyear, about seventeen plastic army guys (whom they fed to the dog - with crayons, of course), and a toy cash register... they also busted up my kitchen chair. Sigh...... So now three of the five chairs are now broken. And then the other two are wobbly as crap. So, for my birthday, I either want a new dining set or new chairs. I just can't risk someone coming over and sitting in my busted chair and ending up in the floor. I've already put this bug in Billy and the kids' ears. They all just laugh at me. And then I hear Billy mumble something about getting me an Xbox controller. I swear to you... if that man buys me a video game controller for my 35th birthday, he'll be sleeping in his truck for a week. So Billy, if you're reading this... be warned.

But yeah, we went back to church this weekend. It was, again, a nice quiet service. Met a couple more ladies who invited us to a prayer group for military wives on the main post. I'd heard of the group before. So, we'll see. Emma seemed to enjoy it better. She invited a friend this time, so I'm sure that helped.

Billy had a nice lazy weekend and rested well. So this morning when he texted me after his run, he said he got to lead the group and they were all telling him to slow down. Um... really? One week of hard core training and he's already a different person. AMEN!! Oh and did I mention I've gone to the gym three days this past week? I'm starting the Couch to 5K program. It's a guide that takes you from basically couch potato status to walking to running in a few months. Not that I need to run any marathons any time soon. But it is a good workout and it is a gradual thing, so I can do this!! Oh and we also went on a family bike ride Saturday evening. Now, that was awesome! William on his little big wheel just blasting down the road. Too cute!!! The girls kept getting distracted with their friends and would stop and chat for a while then catch up to us later. I'm not sure we were all five together for more than a couple minutes at a time. But it was a really nice little ride through the neighborhood. Only down side... my butt is all kinds of sore!!!
**Note to self: buy a fat-bottom bike seat... and soon.**

Oscars, PT, Gifted program, taxes, soccer and other things

Hold on tight... I've got a lot to say and only an hour to type it all out.

First off, I'm extremely disappointed in the Oscar nominations this year. I understand that Harry Potter wasn't this artsy fartsy movie that I normally enjoy... but COME ON!!! This movie makes over a BILLION dollars and has one of the most sentimental death scenes (Snape) in the history of movie making and they don't even get a nod... not a nod! I'm not happy with this, people. Yeah Yeah... it's just a movie. But still. I feel sad and somehow heartbroken to hear they were overlooked. Not fair. Not fair at all. They'll nominate a girl for having a seriously hilarious "pooping in the sink" scene and then not even look twice at Alan Rickman for his 12 years as Professor Snape!!  Very upset with you Academy!!!!! I'm seriously thinking about not even watching this year!

Anyway... moving on...

So, I went to church on Sunday. it was the chapel service run by the chaplains in our neighborhood. So, it was all military AND all families from our neighborhood. It was really nice - done in the school down the road. So it was close and familiar and felt good. Billy didn't attend as he was having stomach issues. But I know he'd like it. I'm going to make him go next time. I just loved how the pastor / chaplain tied in forgiveness with doing a 12 mile ruck march. LOL! It was just neat. Emma wasn't thrilled. The kids church was a little "young" for her I think. Allison enjoyed it though. And William... well he was ready to go back as soon as we got home.

A while back I mentioned that Emma was being tested for the Gifted Program at school. Sadly, they said she wasn't eligible. It was a bit of a blow. I didn't help matters talking it up like "hey I was in gifted and it was awesome!" and then she doesn't get in. So, I had to explain to her that back then they didn't test people like they do today. And that I probably wouldn't have made it in if I had to be tested. You know, taking tests is not my thing. But give me a story to read and write a paper on it... done. Deciding A B C or all of the above... I always freeze. Like taking the compliance tests back when I worked for the bank. I knew that stuff inside and out, but always struggled with the tests. I think I just over think things. And I'm sure that's where Emma froze, too. She just didn't get a high enough score. And all this on the same day that her best friend in her class got moved into another classroom. Blah.

Moving on...

And then of course, I finally make it up to the Child and Youth Services to sign the kids up for soccer. The good news is, William is on a team and starts practice in March. Allison... not so much. She got put on a waiting list because there were too many kids. POO!! But she's number four, so maybe that won't be such a big deal.

I went ahead and filed our taxes this year. I wasn't sure I could do it with all the military stuff, but really it wasn't any harder than doing it last year. Only thing is MTSU screwed me up by billing me for my tuition for the Spring of 2011 in December of 2010 - so I couldn't count that as a education credit. But because my pell grant was applied in January of 2011, I had to report that as income. GGRRR!!!!! Stupid people! Oh well... I guess it could be worse and we'd have to owe money. It was really only a difference of about $300 that I'd have gotten back. But still... that's a years worth of toilet paper, right there.

Moving on!!!

So yeah... I lay out all my doubts and fears to God last week. I seriously laid it all out there for the world to see, if they so chose to read... I had many friends send me very reassuring private emails and I can tell you that my outlook is changed completely!! I just needed that boost again. That jump out of the pit of despair. I don't think I'm 100% back to where I was, but I can already feel a peace surrounding me that I have really missed. I know going to church really helped. I know that pulling out the old bible and following an online prayer group were things that I needed more than I knew. It's been a blessing!!

Speaking of blessings!!! Billy's First Sgt had a fit yesterday when he found out no one was going to the afternoon PT sessions. Of course, Billy didn't know they were having these PT sessions - as did anyone else for that matter. First Sgt said that if anyone misses another one, they were going to get an Article 15. So, um... how is this a blessing? Well, for one... it is MAKING people go to these things, which is what Billy's been needing all along. But since no one else was going, he didn't think he could go either. It's just weird. But anyway... he's going again. Which is a good thing. I can't imagine what would have happened if the First Sgt hadn't of stepped in.  Kinda like how he threw a fit because no one signed up to go play paint ball. But get this... no one even knew they were doing paint ball, much less looking for volunteers. Whatever... moving on...

AND... apparently my drivers license expires on my birthday in a couple weeks. So, I go online to renew it and OOPSIES! they won't do it online. I have to go in. Um.. I can't just drive to TN and renew my license. So, I had to call and after being on hold for 23 minutes, transfered between departments, hung up on, leaving a voice mail, and receiving an email to which I had to reply to with a question and have yet to recieve an answer back.... I still don't know how to get my license renewed. LOL! But... this is just one of those things. And I'm fully convinced that it is the military's fault. Everything in the military is tedius and a pain in the butt, so let's just throw this into the mix as well. After all, I had to go through the military liason due to the fact that we are stationed out of state and blah blah blah... BIG HAPPY GRIN!!! Moving on...

Just felt like I needed to share this

I've heard that when you feel a distance between yourself and God it is because you've pulled away, not because God has left you. It's very easy to become comfortable in your daily life, that you start to forget or possibly take for granted the power God has on your every day tasks. I always "saw" God in everything I did. I would wash the dishes and have everyone clean and ready for bed just in time to catch up on some conversation with Billy or watch a television show - and I would give thanks for just that small thing. The clouds would clear just as I was preparing a road trip down the road and I would give thanks to God for just that small little thing. I would be struggling with something (or Billy would be struggling) and I'd go to the bible and find just the exact words to comfort me and I would give thanks for that small little thing. I've not felt that presence of God in my life lately. I look back and think how much we relied on him for every little detail (like praying over our mailbox while Billy was at basic training) during this "joining the Army" experience. We prayed for news, we prayed for a house, we prayed for friends... all these things have been answered. Maybe not right away, but they were answered when God knew it would be the right time for us. So when I pray for Billy to pass his PT test, I was hurt when God didn't bless us with that. So I guess I felt let down. I've been saying it all along... Why would God put us here just to see us fail? But we weren't failing because Billy wasn't doing his PT test ten seconds faster or his situps just a little better. We were failing because we let God get out of the picture. I've lost sight of how much I depended on God and his word. It's like we got here and I suppose we felt that it was OK to let our guard down since we got where we wanted. So when we got here, I somehow put God on the shelf. I stopped seeing him in everything like I used to. I didn't want God to see my broken self. I didn't want him to see the struggle I was dealing with in finding friends worthy or a church that was good enough. Plus, I mean, heck... we were here. Our prayers had been answered. Why bother praying for the next big thing? Why bother finding a church when it's not like the ones back home? Why bother opening the bible when it looks so pretty on the shelf with the other books? And here we are... back to worrying over being sent back home because of a ten second goof and 8 inches of a situp. Does God want us to stay? Does He want us to go home? What is His will for us? How do I pray for it? I have no idea what is going to happen. I know that Billy is scared to death of not passing this next test. We don't know when it is going to be, but I fear sooner than we know. I just wish I could feel confident in the outcome, no matter what it is. I do know that I will love Billy and support him no matter what happens. I just can't help feel anxious for the unknown.

"It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone." Ephesians 1: 11-12

One year

One year ago, Billy was in Nashville being sworn in as Future Soldier to the US Army. I can't even begin to tell you how much this year has done for us. I started this blog just a couple days after he began this process. I find it is so rewarding to sit back read all the posts from a year ago and then compare them to what we're going through now. I can't believe it's been an entire year. There are some things that have happened since we've been in that I pretty much expected and some things that I'm disappointed in and then some things that I've been pleased with.

Pretty much expected that we'd have to move away from family. That basic training would suck for Billy and us as well. That he would give it his best effort. That there would be a lot of perks for being a military family.

Disappointed in the fact that Billy's unit isn't what we had hoped. That he's having such a hard time with his PT. (he told me this morning that when he was at AIT and Basic he started to really love to run and did really well. But here he hates it and is doing really bad) That everything we do is a process and a half. Nothing has been easy - from enrolling in school to getting ready for missions. And I know this is going to shock a lot of people and I'm sorry if I sound hypocritical, but I'm disappointed that he may not get a chance to deploy. NOW... having said that... I do not want him to leave AT ALL! Especially while he is in this unit he hates so much and all that. BUT... I would hate for him to have to tell his grandkids that he was in the Army during the war and all he ever did was sit stateside and stare at the motorpool walls all day. We're also disappointed in how hard it is going to be for him to earn rank. He's only an E3 and I just don't see him getting promoted any time soon like we'd hoped. If he deployed, he could probably move up a little faster.

Pleased with the fact that we live in an awesome place. I really think we chose well when we picked this neighborhood. I've been to some of the newer housing on the main post and they really kinda suck. So, I'm very happy with where we are. Not only the structure and the location, but also the people. I really like where we live. My kids are starting to feel at home and there is that moment when you realize you're going to miss the friends you've made here just as much as you miss the friends you made back at home. I don't want to leave yet. I want to go home and visit, but I'm not ready for this adventure to be over.

But all in all, this has been a great year. One full of pain, strength, fear, relief, loneliness, communication, encouragement, rewards, farewells, reunions, change, settling in, old friends, new friends, ups and downs. And in all of this... there are no regrets. Never a regret.

The Peeper

Apparently, we've had a fellow out here looking into people's windows and then hurting children. Now, I would not believe such nonsense except the MP's have been cracking down severely in the neighborhood. The other day Emma was at the park (which is actually a set of swings and a little climbing thing down at the end of the street and just happens to be the backyard of one of my friends) and an MP stopped her and asked her where her mother was and where she lived and then told her to go home. Now, I was under the impression that children over the age of 10 were allowed to play without direct supervision. I still don't think I'm wrong, but I guess they are just making sure no one gets in the line of this Peeper guy. There have just been all kinds of rumors and kids are going around saying the "Child Killer" is out there! And it's nuts. Like I said, I would not have even given this a second thought except now it's hitting home when the MP's are guarding all the parks and playgrounds and constantly roaming up and down the streets (some on foot and some in vehicles). It's just a bit unnerving. I really don't know what to think. Glitter Mama (my friend) went down there and talked to these MP's and I guess they've been trying to catch this guy for weeks. So, here's my question. We live on a military post. You have to go through a security checkpoint with 100% ID check. There are hundreds upon hundreds of trained combative soldiers here - I'm sure there are several in the Special Forces - many many of them have been in combat and overseas tracking Iraqi's and who knows what else... and you mean to tell me they can not catch a black male between the ages of 19 and 25 who is probably a resident here and is threatening our children??!!?? Blech! People are just crazy.

In other news, today Billy was preparing for PT by stretching and what not and he got pulled out to go to the range for target practice. Then he finds out that while he was gone, they ended up doing the "ability run" which is the good kind of running that he needs (and not the run 4 miles at the fastest speed possible which is what they've been doing all this time). It's like, REALLY? How are they going to pull him out of PT when he needs it more than most and then make him wait around for four hours before taking them to the range. Why could he not have done the run AND go to the range. I'm so aggravated I could just scream sometimes. I sincerely hope they do this run again. Oh and no afternoon PT either. GGRRR!!!!!

But then there are my kids... they continue to make life a little brighter. William has now learned to feed the dog. I let him do this and he feels like a real big kid. Plus, Shadow sees him do this and I hope that will create a trust between the two of them. I know that sounds odd, but I have heard and truly believe that the person who feeds the animals is the one the animal will love most. So... we'll see. Also, Emma has started Girl Scouts. So if you want to buy some cookies... well, that wouldn't make sense. It'd cost a fortune to mail them. But anyway. Or you can order them, and we'll put them in the freezer until we see you next... just a thought... Oh and Emma also got invited to be in the Drama Club at school. Very exciting stuff there!! And then Allison has been studying whales at school. She came home and literally talked about it for an hour. I was going about doing my daily stuff (cooking, laundry, dishes, going to the bathroom) and she followed me everywhere I went talking about all the neat stuff about whales. Too cute!

Anyway, hoping for more "ability runs" like they did today and more chances for Billy to get at making his goals. I really do not want to make myself have to go down to the commander and make an A$$ of myself. Of course, we all know I would never. But still... this is my life too! And no peeper or commander is going to bring me down!

One too few

I hate to say it but Billy didn't pass his test this morning. He missed his sit ups by one. ONE! ONE STINKING SIT UP! And it was just a struggle!! He said he got to the end and knew he only had one more. He got about half way up and fell back down. He tried again... got half way up and they were all yelling at him to "wiggle up" so that he could get up. He said he was kicking his legs and the spotter holding his feet kept coming off the ground trying to hold Billy down. He falls back down and does this about three times until the time ran out. So, really he was a half a sit up away. He was so heartbroken that by the time he did his run, he just felt like he couldn't do anything. He was a minute off on the run. So, this hasn't been a great day for us. I know he's disappointed as am I. But the First Sgt is going to give him one last chance.... we just don't know when. In fact, the First Sgt asks him if he passed. Billy said no. First Sgt asks by how much. Billy says One sit up. First Sgt said, "You want to get kicked out, don't you?" Poor Billy. Of course doesn't want to get kicked out. So, here we are again... on the waiting train. I wonder how many counseling statements he'll have to sign now. Oh well... I'm going to ride his butt until he gets where he needs to be. Even if it means holding his feet while I scream in his ear the whole time. I mean sit ups here... come on.

Speaking of one too few... Allison wants to wear a bra now. She's a flat as hardwood floor. But I let her have one of Emma's old ones. She's so proud of herself, she can't hardly stand it. She asked me tonight before bed if she needs to wear it to bed. I said she could if she wanted to, but eventually she won't want to. Just super cute. Oh and please do not say anything to her about me telling the world about this. She'd die. Absolutely die!!

But continue to keep us in your prayers. I do not want Billy to get kicked out any more than he does.

Sigh

So, Billy's PT test isn't Friday. It's tomorrow. I think he'd be just fine except he got a super horrible migraine this afternoon. So what was supposed to be a night of chugging water and pasta to boost his energy up for his run in the morning... has now turned into me trying to keep the house quiet and dark and I seriously doubt he'll even eat anything tonight. This is not a good thing. He's not had a migraine in weeks and now I'm starting to agree with his mother that this is probably stress related. But at the same time, I'm really kind of mad at him because he just refuses to take anything when he starts getting these headaches. He had three hours off this morning and rather than go to the store to get some medicine when he felt the headache coming on, he sat in his truck in the freezing cold. I swear. I do not understand that man sometimes. He could have even come home during that time... but nope. He'd rather eat his bologna sandwich alone in his truck and let his migraine grow into some horrible mess. I don't know what to do.

And not only that, but I have had a bit of a stressful couple of days watching my neighbor's kids. Three four year olds... (well almost) are a lot of handle. It's just that when they are around, William has to act like the world's biggest terd. It's hard when a bunch of kids come in and just take over his toys. I get that. But then when the little kids come over and bring toys and then refuse to share... it just sets everyone off. I'm probably going to be OK. But I am trying to get used to their behavior while trying to not hang my son out to dry. It doesn't help when Williams' been sleeping like the weirdest hours. He's not getting enough rest and it's about to wear on all of us. Plus, my attitude in the afternoons when the girls get home isn't the best and that's not fair to them. But I'm not going to quit. I just need to figure out how to balance it. I'll probably get it all figured out about the time they leave.

So I've got that on my shoulders and Billy's test tomorrow. My stomach is turning and I'm just about to scratch my eyeballs out.

I made myself a promise that I wasn't going to make this blog a vent fest. But today... I really just needed to vent.

Getting caught up

I've been blogging in my head for days now. I keep thinking of things to say but just never have a chance to sit down and actually type it all out. So, I sat down this morning and made myself do it. I went back and post-dated a couple of them so that I didn't have so much to say on one post. Feel free to scroll down and read... enjoy!

Got myself a job

My neighbor directly across from me (the one who invited us to her church this Sunday) has asked me to babysit her kids for a couple weeks until she quits her job. Her husband is training for Special Forces and just got orders to go back to Fort Campbell in the beginning of February. So, rather than put the kids in daycare and spending a lot of money, I'm going to keep her kids and help her save a little money. We agreed on a little amount that will hopefully make it worth while. It isn't like I've got a full time career job, but it will be something anyway. And we're only talking about maybe three days a week until February. I was glad to help her. I just hope the kids don't drive me crazy. It's a little boy and a little girl (ages 3 and 4). So, I hope they don't think it's funny to color my walls with magic marker or feed the dog crayons. But my friend the lady on the corner is going to be right across the street and told me to bring them over every once in a while to let them play with her kids as well. Kids do better in groups. Moms do better in groups too, I think.

So yeah, I start tomorrow. Say a little prayer that all goes well.

Glitterfest

The ladies that I have come to really care about here all live on my street. It's not a very long street but it is kinda neat that we all pretty much found each other and can manage to hang out without a lot of drama and nonsense. I like to think of us in pairs. There's me and the lady on the corner - we are down on the same end. Then there's glitter mama and the gal whose husband is deployed - they live on the other end across from each other. Then there is the nurse lady and the gal whose husband is gone for training - they live in the middle and right next door to each other. So, we all decided to have a New Years party - or Glitter Fest. Everyone had to dress up in something sparkly and then cover themselves in glitter. It was awesome! Even the husbands got attacked with the glitter spray at certain points through the night. Poor Billy. I made the glitter mama spray him. There was no hope for him. She got him good. It was just a fun evening! Most new years over the past several years, we've just kinda woke up around midnight and kissed each other and the kids and then went back to sleep. This year we were surrounded by so many good friends and all their kids. It was awesome!! At midnight, we just walked around hugging and kissing as many people as we could find. There were so many people there, it was a while before we ran out of friends to hug. Makes you kinda feel good.

The TV troubles

I've been wanting Billy to invite his "girl friend" (the girl he works with and met at AIT and the one we went to Christmas dinner with) over for a long time. He talks about her all the time and I just really wanted to meet her. So, after we ate Christmas dinner with her and her family, I thought I'd invite them over to our house. Billy said we were too boring and that no one wants to hang out with boring people. I admit, we aren't like real big on partying or whatever. But I didn't think we were that boring. So, I invite them over for pizza and games. We had gotten a new Xbox Kinect for Christmas (thanks Papaw) and wanted to play some games. So they were going to bring over a few games and guess what... Billy's TV dies. Dead. Dead Dead. It won't turn on at all. Thank goodness we still have the extended service agreement and we can get it fixed for free. But the bad thing is we have to wait a whole week. Or maybe longer. So, here we are about to have our new friends come visit out house for the first time to play the Kinect and now we have no TV. Billy was flipping out. So, we ended up taking the TV out of our bedroom and bringing it downstairs. We went from the 56 inch screen to a 30 inch screen. None of us could read anything on the stupid screen. Lord, have mercy! We are so spoiled, it is nuts. But before we decided to bring the TV from the bedroom down, Billy was convinced we needed to go buy a new TV. Just the thought of that made my stomach hurt. Because I know him and I know he's going to want to buy something bigger than what he's already got. Which is nuts. I'm still thanking God for that extended warranty. Mainly because back when we were shopping for washer and dryers, he kept getting sucked into the TV room where there was a 92 inch flat screen up on the wall. He was like moaning with excitement over this monster of a TV. This thing was ridiculous. And what didn't help matters at all is that on this exact day, three of the six ladies whom I drink coffee with every day all got new TV's for their husbands. We're talking like 70 inch smart TV's all bought on the same day that I refuse to let Billy buy a new one. I suppose I am the mean wife since I won't let Billy buy a new one as long as this one is still under warranty. So, yeah, anyway, we ended up playing games on the smaller TV and still managed to have a nice time with Billy's friends. She and I got along well. So despite the TV trouble, we enjoyed our visit with our new friends. And if they thought we were boring, they never let on. Well, they did leave before 9 pm. So, maybe we were a little boring.

Drama Drama Drama

I completely understand that sometimes kids (mainly girls) are mean. I get it. I hate it, but I get it. Kids are mean. The occasionally bragging or showing off of new toys is in a way, I guess, understandable. But when the kids start spreading lies about my child and then telling all the other kids on the street to not play with me child.... UM... NO! I have very little patience when I catch a kid in a lie. Be it my kid, or someone else's - very little patience.

Needless to say, there's been a little bit of ridiculous drama going on with some of the kids on my street. It kinda revolves around one particular girl and my daughter. But see, I know that my child is not innocent and not some victim here. But this other child... OH. MY. GOD! I have no patience for the crap that goes on. So, I've spent the past few days putting out fires up and down the street because these kids keep starting junk that just isn't going to fly with me. I'm kinda over it. I'm sick of the drama. But I don't know how else to get it to stop unless I tie them all to their beds.

Star Trek

Billy and I were sitting here watching the new Star Trek movie (well the newest one) and I was just super confused through the whole thing. See, I have never watched nor really understood any of the movies, the shows... none of that. I'm more of a period romance type of gal... not so much a science fiction spaceship kinda gal. Anyway, Billy is giving me all the details about how it is possible for Spock to be old and young and how Kirk really wasn't a deadbeat and that his dad never actually died. I was totally lost. So, I look on Facebook later that afternoon and here is what Emma posted...

"[My parents] are watching Star Trek and mama is so confused daddy is trying to explain it and all I hear is blah blah time travel blah blah dead blah blah blah ramen noodles?? blah blah blah volcan blah blah its confusing"

Ramen noodles - Romulans. I thought I was going to pee in my pants! She just totally cracked me up!!

And then later on that day I said to Billy because I'm so super smart, "Hey they should make a star trek where the new generation meets the old generation." He just looked at me like I had horns. He says, "they already did that." Well DUH! Like I'm supposed to be all current on the Star Trek information. PPPPBBBLLLTT! (that's me blowing a raspberry)

Smallest World

So, we had a wonderful Christmas! Despite being so far from home, we were able to talk to the grandparents and even open presents over Skype; so that was neat! We ended up going to both Christmas dinners that day. For lunch we went to my lady on the corner's family's home in Falcon, NC. This is like the smallest little town on the planet. Very similar to Santa Fe, TN. And this is the most amazing thing... as we were sitting there after dinner one of the aunts asks me where we are from. I say, "About an hour south of Nashville." To which she replies, "Oh are you familiar with Santa Fe?" Billy and I almost fell on the floor! "That's where we are from!!" So, upon further discussion, we figure out that they have a cousin who was married to a fellow from Santa Fe. And then upon even further discussion we figure out that the fellow is the current husband (and ex husband to said cousin) to one of my dearest friends in Santa Fe. I could not believe it!! I mean, it was like taking two needles and throwing them in a haystack and then pulling them both out at the same time. Especially considering that Santa Fe and Falcon are two of the tiniest towns in the world! I just loved that! It was just really kinda awesome!

That evening we had dinner with the family of a girl that Billy has known since AIT. She has a sweet little family. Four kids and her husband stays home with the baby. I was extremely nervous about going to their house. I guess I just didn't want to say or do something stupid. Which is never a hard thing for me to do. I always seem to say and do stupid things. But anyway, we had a nice time. There were a few people there from Billy's unit and getting to finally meet the people that he talks about so much was a great thing. I even got to talk to one of the guys that is trying to get Billy to go work out with him. He told me he had plans on kicking Billy's butt! I sure hope so! PT test is Jan 6th. Sigh...

That night we got home and I was so tired I just completely crashed. It was a busy Christmas day, but we all had a super nice Christmas.

Oh and Billy bought me a new coffee pot. SQUEE!!! Love it!

Merry Christmas!

I'm still alive... I promise

I've not posted in a while. I've just been trying to think of what to write. See, if I write about what I think is going to happen with Billy and the Army, it is always wrong. So then I wait to see if what I hear actually happens and by then it seems so dull, I don't think I should bore anyone with it. Am I making sense at all? Plus, we've got Christmas this weekend and I've just been kinda running around like a looney toon trying to get everything together. But I will give you a run down of the highlights from the last two weeks.

First, the president visited Fort Bragg. Billy got the honor of guarding a parking lot. Which apparently was kinda neat, because they only picked a few of them. So he gets there at 3 am and sits in his car for 12 hours (except for the 25 minutes he stood out and directed buses out of the parking lot) and then gets a nice pat on the back for it. He was offered tickets into the place where Obama was giving his speech and he graciously declined. At the time, he was trying to stay awake and wasn't sure hearing a 30 minute speech would keep him from falling asleep. Of course, now that it is over, he kinda wishes he would have gone. I mean, who gets to say they got to see the President speak live - even if he's not fond of the guy. But he did get to see Air Force One. The plane - not the movie.

Second, Billy got yet another counseling statement about his PT test. This is six now. From six different people. It's like, really? Every person in charge has to discuss it with him as if he's forgotten what he's done. But he gets a chance to do a diagnostic run on Jan 6 which if he passes should lift the flag and everything attached to it. If not, he'll have 30 days from that point to pass the real test and if he fails that one... he's out. Blah! And by out... I mean out of the Army. No pressure though. GRRR!!! So here's my problem with this whole counseling statement thing. On it, it says that Billy is required to do remedial PT. This is that special PT in the afternoons. Since he got put on this bar/flag, he's had ONE session of remedial PT. This is something that his command sets up. How is that going to help him? And I know, if he argues that point they'll just say he should have been doing it on his own. So whatever. He's going to start working out with another guy next week, I hope, and get ready for his practice test on the 6th. Everyone pray!

Third, me and my gal-friends had a little Christmas party at my house last Friday night. Everyone was impressed with my party hosting skills. LOL! I was kind proud of my self. It was loads of fun. Kids had a blast. And I got a really cute picture of all us gals and a new coffee cup. Fun stuff!! One of the girls' husbands took a liking to Billy and they chatted for a while. He's not really been involved with the husbands yet so that made me feel better.

Fourth, the kids are out of school and we've not stopped doing stuff. We went to Chuck E Cheese for William's birthday on Tuesday. He had a blast! You should see that kid play some Air Hockey! It was super fun!

Fifth, Billy's good buddy Jonathan came into town yesterday. We took him to dinner and I know Billy really needed that. Just to have a piece of home here for a while was priceless. Billy's just been so down lately with the whole PT mess and being stuck here for the holidays. So to have his best friend come in was just what he needed. Although, he's still not 100%. I'm just hoping things will turn around after this PT mess is over.

Sixth, I THOUGHT Billy and I weren't exchanging gifts for Christmas since we got the washer and dryer. Little turd went out and brought home a nice big box with my name on it. So, I did a last minute run to get him some new sunglasses that I know he really needed. In the car that afternoon, I turned to him and said, "I really hope you like your new sunglasses. D'OH! I mean Christmas present!!" He just smiled. But I got all ridiculous about it! I wanted it to be a good surprise and I just made a mess of the whole thing. GRR!! Oh well, sucks to be a dummy!

So, maybe I know why I've not posted in a while. I know things are kinda sad here - at least for Billy. I don't want to be all doom and gloom. So, I've just kinda not felt like sharing all the sad stuff. It's not all sad. We've been having a few great laughs. Like when Allison was trying to teach William his birthday song...

Allison: Ok William. When I sing this, "whose birthday is it?" You say, "me me me!"
William: OK!
Allison: Are you ready?
William: YEAH!
Allison: Whose birthday is it?
William: You You You!!

And then there's my gal-friends who I've really started to care for. I love these ladies! It's not anywhere that you can say, "my husband went to the gas chamber today" and no one thinks twice about it. (Billy really did have to go this week. No big deal, just testing his mask) But they're already planning a big New Years Bash. I'm super excited about it! So this is going to sound awful, but I really want Billy to pass this test next month so that we don't have to leave. I kinda feel like I've found my place here. And a couple of my friends invited me to their church - I can't wait to go! They've got great things to say about it! So, yeah... I'm not ready to leave.

The life of an Army Wife

So, William and I have finally found our little niche. I've made friends with a group of ladies that live on my street. These are the 'coffee drinking gals' from a while back. But the more I hang out with these girls, the more I've gotten to really love being around them. They can be serious and silly. We can talk about politics and dirty diapers. And they all like their coffee just like me... a little bit of coffee and a lot of cream.

This weekend we had William's birthday party. His birthday is not for a while, but we did it early so that some of his friends could be here since most of them are headed home for Christmas. So I invited four ladies and their kids. We had a house full! 15 kids - ages 2 to 12. It was actually a lot of fun!

And then something else kinda cool. We got invited to two different Christmas dinners. One is from the lady on the corner. Her mother lives about 30 minutes from here and they always ask her to bring a family who can't come home for Christmas dinner. So, we're going there for lunch. And then the other dinner is from a girl Billy works with. She went to AIT with Billy and they became close friends. Now they are in the same unit here at Bragg and she asked us to come eat dinner with her and her family that night. I think we'll be nice and partied out. Of course, we used to have the rule that we would not go anywhere on Christmas day so that the kids would have a day to play with their toys. We made this rule because we always had like 7 different houses to visit during the holidays. And now that we aren't going to have all that family to visit, we figured it would be OK to break our rule. I'm OK with that. So, now I'm debating having our Christmas dinner on Christmas eve and just let the kids open all their stuff that evening. Still thinking about that one.

Oh and for heavens sake... President Obama is coming to town this week. It's a big deal. I understand it. But they are making the guys work some long hours this week to get ready for it. Billy's got to be at a meeting at 6 this evening just to learn about what he's going to be doing the next couple of days. So, we may not see much of Billy this week. (time for some Chick Flicks!!!)

And I'm taking my puppy to get "sterilized" tomorrow. I think that means neutered. Why the vet can't just say "neutered" I don't know. Whatever. But I'm very much in love with that pooch. He is so dang smart.

I feel like I've given you whiplash with this post... going in so many different directions. I guess I've just got a scatter brain today. That seems to be my life now a days.

Commander

So things have not been all peachy with Billy and this whole Army thing. I'm not going to say he hates it. But it's beyond frustrating some of the things that go on. Like the whole sick call thing. Sick call is what you and I would call "going to the doctor." But the way his Sgts make it out is like, "if you go to sick call, you're a weak fool and you shouldn't be in the dang military!" But then the next words out of their mouths are, "if you are sick, you better go to sick call because I'm not going to hold your hand and make sure you're feeling ok." It's like Really? What the crap is that all about? And then the whole, "some of you get in trouble for messing up PT and some of you don't." You already know how I feel about that. The only PT they do is running and it is for miles and at a pace that hardly anyone can keep up with. So, rather than build strength, they are bringing everyone down to exhaustion and frustration. And then there is the "We're going to do this tomorrow" and they show up only to be told they aren't doing that anymore. If you know my husband, he is one that likes things orderly and structured. Which is why he thought he would really like the military. There is less organization in his unit than anywhere he's ever worked in his life. Not to mention that everyone there is so negative. All the soliders talk about how much they hate it and how much they want out. Billys like "how am I going to feel good about going in every day when all I ever hear is how much everyone hates it all day long." But here's the thing... they do not do anything! Nothing! They literally stand around for hours on end until the sgts get tired of looking at them and send them home. But maybe... just maybe there is some light...

The company got a new commander this month. She's on top of things. They had a meeting yesterday and she explained how things were going to change. First off, the PT. She says it does no good to run like that everyday. YAY! So, they are going to do what they call ability PT. I don't know, but the way Billy explained it, it is going to group people together according to their PT levels. So, Billy will be with other folks on his level. YAY! Apparently the reason for those people who failed are getting barred is because some people are trying to fail and get out on purpose. This doesn't help Billy in any way. But at least we know that all the folks (including young dude) that failed are now as of yesterday all barred just like Billy. New commander = fair. Then she said this whole business about not getting to go to sick call has to stop. A lot of people who are trying to get out of doing anything will go to sick call and get on "profile" which is like the note you would give your gym teacher excusing you from doing P.E. This all comes at a good time because Billy's been having some serious migraines lately. We've got to get him to the doctor. They're coming on more and more often and this last one was really bad. (the one day they actually got to do something and go to the range to shoot some big guns, he got a migraine and it was so bad they had a medic come and sit with him while he puked his guts out all over the dang place.) After that one, I've decided he's got to go see a doctor. So, when he starts his half days for the holidays, we're going to make him an appointment. So... we'll see. Anyway... back to the commander. She also asked the group how many of them had licenses to use the machines, and only a handful raised their hands. Out of a hundred and something there were only like 5. So, she said that this was ridiculous and that there will some serious training going on. Commander = get r dun! I hope this means that Billy can get certified on some equipment which is what he really wants. We've just got to get him to pass his PT test. Maybe Commander = Hope.

My dry spell is over

Yeah, so I've not been able to read any books for almost 6 months. I don't know why. I just have zero attention span and every single book I pick up, I'll put down after a couple chapters. It's beyond upsetting. I just lost my reading mojo if you will. I kept telling myself it's because I'm so busy and don't have time or energy left at the end of the evening to read. But really... I try and just can't. Until yesterday. I picked up "The Hunger Games" after seeing much chatter about it on Facebook and in entertainment magazines. There is a movie coming out in the Spring. I love a good book made into movie. But anyway. I sat down yesterday and started reading around lunch time. I got into the third chapter and my pulse was racing and I was all "ooohhh" and "oh my!" So, I picked it back up last night around 6 and could not stop reading it. At about 2:30 this morning I finally finished it. I couldn't help it. It's just one of those books you have to finish. And quick. At one point I looked up at the clock and saw it was after 1 am. So, I made it my goal to finish before Billy woke up and saw me reading still. LOL! He was going to wake up at 3am because they were going to the range today to shoot some big guns. But yeah... I still managed to get in about 5 hours of sleep. It was good. Now I've just got to get the next book in the series.
Anyway, Billy and I had a lot of talks this weekend about this whole Army life. This being barred is not doing anything for his confidence. If anything, it is making him more nervous rather than more motivated. And they told him he has to do this special afternoon PT and then every time they have it, they've got him off doing something else. So, he keeps missing the sessions. It's ridiculous. He's not going to get any better if he can't get the help he needs. Oh and the young guy who I thought wasn't in trouble for not passing and then turned out he was... yeah... not so much. He's still not in trouble. He didn't get barred. So now I'm pissed again. This is a guy who will show up like 30 seconds before formation, get in trouble over stupid stuff all the time, and fail all three parts of his PT - and he gets to go to a class to get certified on a machine. And then there's Billy. He shows up every day an hour early. He never leaves because he doesn't want to be late. He misses his run by a few seconds and they bar him. GRRR!!! So whatever. Billy said there is no way he can dispute anything at this point. He's just stuck. I don't know what to do either. Pray I guess.

Ruck = Yuck

So Billy woke up at 3 am in order to get to his ruck march this morning. What is a ruck march? Well, it is a march in full uniform, with weapons, and a 35 pound bag on your back. This particular ruck march was a 12 mile march that they have to do once a year. So imagine wearing your full uniform including a 10 pound helmet, carrying a 35 pound mammoth backpack on your back, holding an 8 pound M16, and toting a 9 pound bag of water to drink. Now imagine walking with all this gear on a beach of loose sand AND walking up hill for half of it. AND doing it in under 4 hours in 37 degree weather. Not fun!! Billy finished in 3 hours and 47 minutes. They measured his ruck sack before he left and he had 47 pounds (he over packed) and rather than risk taking out too much stuff to make it less (it couldn't be less than 35 pounds) he just left it and basically walked around with Allison on his back for 12 miles. Let's just say that when he got home, I got a vivid image of what he's going to look like in 40 years - all hunched over, wearing his long underwear, knees knocking, feet swollen and blistered... it was miserable trying to watch him climb into bed. A heating pad wasn't going to cut it. I had to pull out the heated blanket and just wrap him all up like a buritto. Thank GOD it is only a once a year thing.

Speaking of being old and hurting... did I mention that I can hardly walk today after doing that ABS workout yesterday? Yeah, my ribs and sides feel like I've been punched by a mule - from both sides. We didn't do any kind of workout today. Not that I could have anyway. When it hurts to breathe... it's probably a sign to take a day off.

Anyway, that's all I know today. We're starting to gear up towards Christmas. I've got the kids completely done - I think. I'll have to wrap everything and make sure it all looks even. And we've got to start thinking about William's birthday coming up. Poor kid. I hate how close his birthday is to Christmas. But it's going to be fun. He's got quite a few little friends in the neighborhood that can come to his party. So, it's going to be kinda fun to have that! Can't wait!